They say it’s not good for man to be alone. Maybe this is another one of those statements that are only true in fairy tales. Like that corny saying, "and they lived happily ever after." I always knew that one day my day would arrive… But reality is very far from fairy tales.
But one fine day it arrived. Before I could take control of the situation, I found myself in a vortex of emotions. An intoxicating sensation of happiness, excitement, joy and a sparkle in my eye. All day long I would dance and sing to myself – head over heels in love.
Within a short time we moved in together and it was wonderful and then, suddenly and without noticing just when it happened, the spark in the eyes disappeared, along with the singing, dancing and excitement...
My girlfriend told me that the routine period had arrived. And that’s how it goes. But it was still good and exciting for me.
One day I found myself calculating "who has been taking out the garbage lately?” and then arguments and fights began and I realized that something in our couplehood was in need of improvement.
I decided to think, search and talk, as is characteristic of us women, to seek the truth and not to leave problems unsolved.
At first I felt that for us, falling in love meant that we would tell each other everything and share everything with each other. And we felt at peace with ourselves. We finally felt safe and life seemed rosier than ever. And suddenly, in one unexpected moment, things begin to go wrong. The illusion is shattered and it’s not exactly what we expected. New characteristics and irritating habits are revealed, and we don’t understand how we didn’t notice them previously. And our confidence is undermined.
This situation leads us to anger, frustration, yelling and fighting. We perform all the necessary manipulations in order to get what we want – to make them love us. And the end of this war can end with separation or understanding, a ceasefire, ignoring and the like.
It turns out that that’s how it happens to all of us, for better or worse.
So what can be done in order to preserve couplehood and love?
Every couple has warm enchanted moments that are romantic and happy. It’s important to talk about the pleasant memories, remember them and remind each other of them, again and again. Maybe even to hang pictures of the good times in order to preserve love.
Occasionally set aside romantic days or hours devoted exclusively to the two of you. This could be a trip, meal, weekend etc.
And just like that, for no special reason, put a love letter in his/her bag, send an SMS, flowers, chocolate or any other treat.
Don’t keep any negative baggage bottled up. If he/she hurt you, it’s important to say so. And, of course, if we made a mistake – to admit that mistake, apologize and ask for forgiveness.
Make sure to celebrate all the "togetherness” events: birthdays, wedding anniversaries, the anniversary of the day you became an item and the like. These days remind you of your love and couplehood.
May we all preserve our love very, very well
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