Im so sorry

Ive told you only in letter form and in passing while you were yelling. I cant forgive myself and i never will. Everyday is a struggle without you. I am so sorry. I get sick to my stomach just thinking about this situation. I love you and hope, wish, pray for you and to have you back. Nothing will be half as good. A big part of me died, its been hard. Ive had bad thoughts and time is not healing anything. Ill never forgive myself, i dont expect you to and understand. I love you and want the best for you, i want to make that happen but ive done this to myself. Youre perfect, i love you