My brother Chris and his family

4 years ago, I had found my brother Chris and Since then, I have treated his family shit.

I called his family white trash.

I said his wife was a dog that got spaded.

I even laughed when someone called him a chil molester.

I have pushed him out of my life because a part of me was afraid to be loved by him.

I was afraid to let love in because I was scared he would turn out to be everyone else.

The relationship we have had in the last four years is not the type of relationship I wanted with him.

What I mean is I didn’t want to treat his shit.

Also, there have been lies I have told about cancer and being diabetic.

Just to see if he cared.

I tried to buy expensive gifts to ensure he would stay in my life.

I was so afraid he would leave.

I know sounds confusing one minute, I wanted him out of my life, and the next minute I didn’t want to lose him.

I was confused and didn’t know what I wanted.

With certain events that has happened in the last couple of months, I am able to change and be the person he needs me to be if only he would forgive me and try to let the past go and try fresh.

So I am asking him for his forgiveness.

I was a terrible sister, and for that I am sorry.

Please find it in your heart to forgive me.