I am so lost for words… My heart aches, and I feel like I can’t go on. The darkness overwhelms me, and too often, I find myself wishing to disappear.

Tonight, the thoughts came again—the idea of slipping away, of ending this pain—but then I think of the girls. I can’t do that to them. I have already caused them enough hurt. They don’t deserve to wake up to that kind of loss.

Lord, thank You for Doug. He has awakened feelings in me that I thought had died with my husband. But I don’t know if he can truly give me what I need right now. What I long for is someone to hold me, to make me feel safe. I am so tired of doing this alone… carrying this weight, this sorrow, this emptiness.

Please, Lord, do something. Help me. I don’t have the strength to face another day on my own. Please, just get me through one more day. Then one more after that. Keep me going when I feel like giving up.

I need You now more than ever. Wrap me in Your love, remind me that I am not alone, and show me that there is still light ahead.

Please help me. Please, God.