How To Forgive Those We Hate?

How do you un-do hate? Ctrl + Z – If only this button could be imported from PC into reality, our lives would look different. It is not possible to go back in time and change what happened, but it is possible to stop hating.

Hatred in its dictionary definition is a strong emotion of rejection, towards a person, a group, or even an object, or an idea. Hatred is most often associated with feelings of anger, disgust, and hostility.

The opposite of love is not hatred is indifference

If you hate or care about something

There Are Three Types Of Hatred

Hate because of an injury – If you ask a person why he hates another person, he will probably say that the other hurt, insulted, or separated from him and left him with a mental wound.

Hatred of jealousy- We often hate people who have something we do not have.

unjustified hatred – unjustified hatred is hatred in which a person hates another person or group for no real reason and without justification.

This can be because of skin color, ethnicity, culture, political position, etc.

unjustified hatred is hatred that is full of ego, it is arrogant, opaque, and unnecessary. unjustified hatred does not allow for open discourse while accepting the opinion of the other. It has a desire to change at any cost and if not, the other will be perceived by me as “an enemy”. unjustified hatred leads to destruction because it is a split that brings out evil, contempt, contempt, and dizzying unrest.

It is hard to forgive a person who is hated because of ego, respect, and vengeance that seeks justice. There is a feeling that as long as we hate or get angry we have a “secret weapon” with which we can respond to the injury and not be left behind.

Anyone who has ever felt anger, hatred, and resentment toward another person over and over again knows that being able to let go of those feelings is a huge relief. So true it is easy to say, but very difficult to do.

So What Are We Doing?

3 tips with three exercises

Understanding – Hatred hurts us because ‘the enemy is inside’: Most people are unaware that the reason they are suffering in life is shaping up, crashes at work, in relationships, in the media, lack of motivation and joy. It’s because of remnants of anger, and hatred for things, or people we have not released and are still with us inside the head and affecting our body as well.

The enemy is within ”- the enemy is in things that we did not release and that we could not forgive to release and move on. Everything you hold in your head about someone else stays in your head in body in mind and poisons you. Imagine it is like water you drink and it is mixed with bitterness and poison of resentment hatred and anger. When we hate others we blame them and the feeling of hatred fills us with toxic things.


Describe the situation from 3 points of view – If you have chosen to forgive, release and move on, describe in writing the situation from three points of view: yours, the offender’s, and the one “going up to the balcony” and looking from above.

Compassion – What brings good people to do bad deeds? “Obstacles on the way”: Life is a long and winding journey through which we encounter opportunities and obstacles, small and large bumps that divert us from the path. There are many trials, warning signs, lessons, and challenges in this way of our lives.

At any moment we have the opportunity to re-choose where to turn.

People conduct themselves in a way that they know according to what they have learned and experienced in their lives. Sometimes a sense of belonging, meaning, and attention evokes a particularly abusive ‘spirit of nonsense’ behavior. This does not mean that these people are inherently bad, but it does mean that they are human and wrong.

If they have taken responsibility, asked for true forgiveness and remorse, and understand the meaning of the price they have to pay, who are we to continue to judge and hate them and continue to poison our lives as well?

In order to show compassion towards a person who has hurt us it is important to understand that what brings people to abusive acts is the need to belong and attract attention. And what gets them out of extremes is that they will get empathy from the people they least expected to get, while they really did not deserve it.

Find someone you think is unworthy of compassion, and give it to them. You will see how his heart softens because he needs it most of all.

Exercise for developing compassion and forgiveness: Think of a person who has hurt you, a person you hate, are disappointed, and hurt by. Write down on a page all the good features it has. Strive and shine a flashlight on what is “yes good in it” instead of what is “wrong” in it. No one really knows what goes through a person’s heart. It is very easy to judge a person and think we have a secret key to his brain. Look at the list of “there” instead of “nothing” because a close look at forgiveness and compassion is a great opportunity to remove barriers, weights, pain, and a lot of judgment towards others.

Forgiveness – Forgiving does not mean that I justify the other’s behavior: Forgiving someone does not mean that I justify his abusive behavior. When I forgive a person I hate, I do not remove responsibility from what he has done. I forgive a person and not actually did. I do free myself and stop messing with the pain of hatred that gnaws at me. To release and forgive one can talk about the pain in front of the offender, or with myself honestly (through writing a letter for example), and detail the pain and injustice done to me. The purpose of forgiveness is to put aside all the sickness that comes and move on in our lives.

Forgiveness does not have to keep in touch with the offender, this is why you can also forgive people who are not alive. Forgiveness allows you to close a chapter and start a new chapter and the most important gospel about forgiveness is that you do not need the other person to forgive.