Life not Lived

Lord, I am sorry for all I do that is not pleasing to you.

I keep on doing this-“repenting”- without changing. I am a sinner and unworthy.

But you are a fantastic god Lord. You bless me and protect my family.

You love me. I confess my sins- that i engage in adultery of the mind, that I lie, that i gossip, that I hate, that I cheat, that I am pride-ful, that I feel so unworthy, that i do not read your word, that i do not speak with you, that I go on throughout my life so un-god living in sin and filth. I am disgusting to myself.

And I say I’m sorry, but I won’t change. I am sorry for that, forgive me.

forgive me for this life not being used for you! Lord, I do not feel close to you anymore.

It’s weird. I feel lonely and without fire.

Spark that flame within me once more. Help me to change. Help me to love you with everything that i am.

Help! Lord, I ask, and I ask. and I do nothing in return.

I am greedy. And though i feel terrible about asking this, lord, i pray you will help me with my health and weight.

Help me with this, please.

I know i am greedy, a loser who is the world’s greatest sinner, masked behind a mask of cleanliness, but please.

Forgive me, and help me, Father.

Help me to live with you and change and change my entire life.

Lord, i pray you to hear this and that you will continue to bless our familly.

Lord, I thank you for your son. You truly love us.

I pray this in Jesus? name, Amen.